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brandybear
There is an obvious attraction to the path of least resistance...
 
To drink or not to drink?
I am not a smart cookie.
I cancelled my digital cable after I realized Mark had been renting way too much porn and my cable bill was up around five hundred dollars.  I didn't however, take in to account  that the internet would go as well. So here I am, at the library (pronounced libary by yours truly) because I'm an addict.

But speaking of addictions, when do you decide enough is enough? And when you come to this decision, where do you draw the line?
A few weeks ago, I got high with Jocelyn and her boyfriend. The next day, Will noticed some lovely looking bruises right on my vein (I know, I'm bad) and I lied about it.  This got me thinking, is it out of control when you have to lie to those who you know will be there for you no matter what?
After a whirlwind week of trying to numb the drug cravings by drinking, I threw a blender at Williams' head and it reminded me of the expression "straw that broke the camels' back". He phoned my mom, and her boyfriend showed up the next day to take me to rehab.
Now, there is no way on gods green earth I would ever go to rehab. And forcing me could be construed as kidnapping. But after cleaning up the ginormous (brandy-ism: Gigantic + Enormous) mess of raspberry vodka smoothie that was in the blender when I threw it, I decided I'd had enough.
So here I am, completely sober. It feels a little unreal, but nice all in the same. And even though I would give my  favorite pair of jeans for a drink right now,  I  don't feel like getting high, which is good. There is something so invasive about  sticking a needle in your arm just for a feeling.
I was listening to this song the other day, and there was a line in it that said "in the moment you are just so right".  It's true, and it makes me a little nostalgic  for the feeling, but the high you get is not worth what  you pay for  it.  As for the drinking,  we shall see how long that lasts.  But if Erinbear is an advocate, it must be okay

 
Just stopping in

September 5th
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September 4th
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September 2nd
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September 1st
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August 30th
erinbear

August 29th
google

August 27th
skittles

August 26th
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August 25th
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August 24th
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August 23rd
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wendyinchicago
Chose to stick around

the down side
- mom had a severe case of sundowning last night...not recognizing her environment or people...
...
Quietdrive - Time After Time (Cyndi Lauper Cover)
- Lying in my bed, I hear the clock tick, And think of...
...
Republicans Go For A Woman VP
- I'm going with my first response, that the Republicans are trying to win over...
...
days are flying by

September 2008
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August 2008
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